What A Woman

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A True Struggle With BPD

She greets you with a smile…

Her makeup  is flawless, lips perfectly curved, excitement to see you exudes from her.

“She is so happy,” they think, “what a woman!”

At every event she is quick to help, she always knows what comes next,

she has a list to guide them all in what to do.

“She has it all together,” they think, “what a woman!”

Sunday, at church, she hugs each one she sees,

she listens to the ails and prayer requests one and all, then goes to the front and sings.

“Doing God’s work,” they think, “what a woman!”

At home she takes off the perfect mask, she wishes someone would help her,

who will be here, who will pray for her?

What a woman, she thinks as she draws the razor across her skin,

what a woman, indeed.

I hide behind masks, constantly seeing to the needs of others.

Can’t they hear my screams? I’m drowning! I’m dying!

It’s just a matter of time and I’ll be gone. Won’t someone see it’s just a mask?

I’m ill, I’m not ok, but due to this illness I’m not able to say!

I do want your help but I cannot ask. Please come see me, see into my eyes, into my heart.

This razor will only be happy with skin for so long, one day soon…